he loved me first

                     

                   

                                   

Father’s Day came and went without a post… not because I had nothing to write, but because I had more to write than I had time.  Needless to say, I’m now more than a month behind… but better late than never.  First, my dad.  I am incredibly blessed to be the daughter of James William “Jimmy” Johnson.  Like my mom, he entered into the Kingdom of Heaven far earlier than I anticipated, yet there is still so much to be thankful for.  If I were to pick the quality I admire most in my dad, it would be the amount of love he had for my mom.  I was fortunate to grow up in a home with two parents who not only loved and adored me, but they loved and adored each other.  My dad was crazy about my mom.  Even at 62, dad acted like a teenager around her… always wanting to hold her hand, wrap his arm around her waist, or make her laugh.  Throughout my childhood, I learned how a man should treat a woman simply by watching my dad interact with my mom.  I vowed to one day marry someone like my own father… a man I trusted and respected… a man I could depend on with my life… someone who made me feel safe.  Eight years ago today, Cheyenne became that man.  On July 29, 2000, we stood before our family and friends and vowed to love each other until death separates us… just as my parents vowed decades earlier.  Yet, as a beautiful ending to a perfect love story, not even death could separate my parents.  (For those of you who aren’t familiar with my Life Song, my parents were killed by a drunk driver in November of 2005.)  Yes, losing my parents was heartwrenching and tragic, but in spite of my grief, I am thankful.  Thankful my parents left their lives here together and I didn’t have to watch one grieve the other, thankful my parents were never sick, thankful they never became old and incapable.  Thankful.  Thankful for the life God has given me… the life I wouldn’t trade with anyone.  Thankful for my husband who has been my rock. 

Eight years ago today, my dad symbolically gave me away, knowing God had created Cheyenne to be my soulmate and the time was right.  My parents were always proud of Cheyenne, and I know they must be beaming with delight, even now, at how Cheyenne has taken care of me.  The road certainly hasn’t been easy, but Cheyenne stepped up to the plate and embraced me… during the good times – and the bad.  He is the most patient, diligent, hardworking, generous, and selfless person I know.  I could not have been granted a better husband.  Cheyenne beats them all.

                                                  

         And just when I thought Cheyenne couldn’t get any better… he became a father.

to infinity and beyond

 

 

 

I have been trying to accomplish this post for 2 weeks now, but every time I sit down at the computer and stare at these sweet pictures, I become lost for words.  The first time I tried was on June 17th, the day little Charlie should have turned 4 years old.  I made another attempt on June 28th, but found that try to be even more challenging.  You see, June 28th was the one year anniversary of the day Charlie received his angel wings.  Even now, as I sit and type, my mind is flooded with emotion over the loss of this incredible little boy.  There are a lot of things in life I don’t have an answer for… but the one thing that tops the list is why a child would have to endure incredible pain and why a child is forced to leave this earth so quickly.  I’ll never have an answer, except that we live in an imperfect world and God never promised life to be easy.  What He did promise is eternal life for those who choose to follow Him… and in Charlie’s words that means “to infinity and beyond”. 

My husband, Cheyenne, and Chad (Charlie’s dad) have been friends since they were kids.  Their friendship has passed the test of time.  In July of 2000, Chad was the Best Man in our wedding… and just a few months later, Cheyenne was the Best Man in his.  On June 17, 2004, God gave Chad and Kim the most incredible gift when Charlie was born.  

                                                              

I remember meeting him for the first time shortly after.  I was so impressed with his Superman room.  Kim had even made his Superman crib bedding.  (That was when I first discovered Kim was creative with her hands… and could actually work a needle and thread!)  Who knew how appropriate this “Superman” theme would become? 

                      

     

Charlie was just that… a little superhero… proving to everyone in his world that he was a fighter.  On January 3, 2006, Charlie was diagnosed with leukemia… he was just 18 months old.  The news came just weeks after the loss of my parents.  I was already in the depths of despair… and this news was simply too much.  Charlie would go on to endure more than most of us will in our lifetime.  On March 15, 2007 Charlie received a second chance in the form of a bone marrow transplant.  To this day, Chad, Kim and the rest of us are so grateful for the anonymous donor who selflessly sacrificed a part of himself to restore hope.

I prayed so hard, so many times, for Charlie.  Yes, God answered my prayers by healing him… but not in the way any of us wanted.  Just 3 months after transplant, Charlie lost his battle only to win the greatest victory of all… to be welcomed into the Kingdom of Heaven and into the loving arms of Jesus.

To say Charlie loved Buzz Lightyear (from Toy Story) is an understatement.  I gave him a Buzz action figure once, when he was in remission, and even though he already had several others, he treated that thing like it was the coolest gift ever… running it around the house… making it jump off his bed and fly… and all the while yelling, “To Infinity and Beyond.”

Charlie also loved music and playing the guitar… and he was good… really good.  He had his own guitar, not one of those “kid”ones… but a REAL guitar, just his size.  The last memory I have of Charlie is him playing that guitar.  He was dancing and singing and eventually pulled me off of the couch so that I could join him.  Thanks, Charlie, for inviting me to dance.

                                                 

more about “Video of kisses for everybody – Photo…“, posted with vodpod

God has given Chad and Kim doses of sunshine along the way.  First, he gave them Kaylond… their beautiful daughter who looks just like Charlie, but with pigtails!  And now, God is forming a new gift inside Kim… child #3 that will, no doubt, bring another helping of joy! 

Still, please pray for this family… for strength to face each new day and for energy to get out of bed and tackle the emotions that go along with it.  Pray for health for Kaylond and for Baby 3… as I know the “signs and symptoms” that led up to Charlie’s diagnosis have forever changed the way they react to even the slightest bumps and bruises with Kaylond… and rightfully so. 

If you’d like to learn more about Charlie, visit their CarePage.  http://www.carepages.com/  Click on “Visit”. The CarePage name is:  CharliePorter    While you’re there, send them a note of encouragement.  It doesn’t matter if you don’t know them personally.  I know Kim would appreciate being reminded there are people who continue to pray for her and her family.